Paco Joins Weight Watchers

Are Paco and Splinter Twins?

Paco has always been a skinny dog. He has a build similar to that of a whippet. His long skinny legs and tall pointy ears seem at odds with the rest of his body. The first time my grandmother met Paco, she said, “My, oh my, he sure is a homely dog.” Others have compared him to Splinter from the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. Myself, I like to think of him as ‘unique’ looking.

Since returning to Canada after our UK book tour, Paco has become ‘one’ with my mother’s over-sized sofa. He even has to be coerced into coming for a walk.

Paco’s appetite has also increased since our return. He has become obsessed with food. If I don’t feed him on time he starts following me around like a shadow. If I am working on the computer he stands in front of me and stares me down, as if  to say, “Haven’t you forgotten something?” And, if I don’t feed him enough he bullies Jack and Thor, who are 3 times his size, and steals their food. An obvious case of Napoleon Syndrome.

In the beginning I was sympathetic to his growing appetite. But he became increasingly demanding and resorted to barking incessantly at the dog food container every time he wanted food.

Soon people were commenting on how he had lost his whippet figure. So I put him on the scale and was shocked to see that he had gained 8 pounds. “You are going to be too heavy to pull,” I told him. When I showed him a picture of his potential co-pilot replacement, he casually nosed the scale towards me and looked up. Nervously, I stepped on the scale. Touche! Too much food and not enough exercise over the holidays had caught up with me.

Perhaps I should ask Jennifer Hudson if Weight Watchers gives couple discounts.